Not such a tame world....

10 Years....

 

Wow. 10 Years since 9.11....

It hit home to me a couple of days ago that time has passed. The Today show had a segment on Friday where they revisited with five young adults, who all had parents who died in the Twin Towers. 10 years ago they were all very much young, shaken & scared children. Now, they were "grown up".

So 5 years ago I blogged about my own events for 9.11 - the link to that blog is here. I'd still write the same version of events, just using "ten years" instead of "five years."

"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter."

Martin Luther King, Jr.

And here's a touch o'Green....

The foyer tree:

 

So here was the Valentine's Decor....

 At the front door was my $5 find from Wal-mart:

 

And in the foyer is my seasonal tree. I try to limit my decorating to my foyer tree and the living room mantle. Mainly so that a) I'm not storing gobs of stuff and b) the house doesn't start to look like a theme park. I do hope that down the road in a few decades,Tabitha remembers how much fun the house was around the holidays. And she may remember how giddy, looney I get about decorating. :-)

So here's my foyer tree with the banner I made this year with my cricut. And yup - I was goofy enough to special order pink lights off the 'net. (I planned ahead and got some green ones at the same time, too.)

 

Some close up's:

 
 

This year, I wanted pink lights for the kitchen bar space. And of course, lots of fluffy white marabou feathers just add to the fun factor.

 

I decided that the dining room table would indulge my "glamour" girl.

 

And then I went all hearts all over the mantle.

I had treated myself to tulips during Feb, but they finally were past their prime. So I ditched'em before the pics. Bad feng shui to have dead stuff around the house anyway....

I had found this adorable pink feather bird at Michael's. I loved it right away even though I had no idea how I'd use it. So for good measure -- I bought two! And they were right at home perching at each end of my homemade banner. Again, I put my cricut thru it's paces.

 
 

So that wraps up the Valentine's Day 2011 Showcase. I'm in the process of decking out in green for the month of March. So far, the foyer tree is sort of done. And that's about it. I'm still dreaming up what to do for the mantle etc.... I need to go on a shopping excursion in search of glassware. But I guarantee that green will be there!

Stay tuned....

"Oh Happy Day!" It's March 1st and that means....

It's time to start celebrating a month of Green!

Wahoo!! My favorite color, for a whole month -- what more could a girl want?

So the project for today is to take down the Valentine's Day decor. The theme this year was pink. And honestly, I'm not sure that I've even taken photos of what I did this year. Well, except for this one:

 
This the collection of jars in the center of my kitchen island. I started decorating with jars of candy about 4 years ago. It was the only way I could think of to keep clutter from accumulating on the island instead. Which was what was happening. And it drove me nuts! Nowadays, instead I have no clutter and a reputation in the neighborhood as having the "good stuff" out on the counter all the time. What can I say? I know kids & how they think. [Big & small, by-the-way....]

I'll go take some pics and post tomorrow. I got pretty darn crafty with my Cricut this year.

So moving right along to March and GREEN, I'm sprucing the place up with some bright green touches. The one that I've gotten done so far was making slip covers for some couch pillows.

This project came about because:

1. I got some new Christmas decoration this past year and didn't want to buy another storage bin to store. So something had to give and not get packed up. After some selective purging -- the best I could figure was that the Christmas pillows that usually live on the couch would get to stay.
2. But it would be totally weird to have Christmas pillows out after December, right?
3. "Sew simple solution" was slip covers. I've done this before and even though I've got sewing skills, this is just super easy straight lines.
4. Then when I happened to be combing the remnants at a nearby fabric store, I found the most striking remnant of green upholstery velvet. I've used this type of fabric before and it holds up well to abuse. And Baby - can my kid & critters pass out abuse? Oh Yes they can! Besides it was cheap and really wide.


So voila!

Before:

 

After:

 

Not too shabby, I think. So now I'm off to work on the rest of the house. I'm feeling a trip to Michael's or Hobby Lobby coming on. Oh -- and then I need to find some bulk candy in green....

"Resistance is Futile - You will be assimilated...."

At least according to Michael these days....

Poor man. I try his patience so....

When we first met & started dating, I was an Apple girl & he was a Microsoft boy. It just was. I was deep in the heart of my Russian degree & Apple made the only Cyrillic keyboard at the time. So in the language lab, I was one of the "lone rangers" sitting on the Mac side.

Michael did his darnest to convert me, but it took a couple of years. And then once we were married, well - my computer upgrades consisted of his computer hand-me-downs, which meant I was firmly in the Microsoft world.

But when the iPod and the Nano came out in the early 2000s, Michael relented and bought me an iPod, in green of course.  I loved that little music player. The simplicity of its design. The elegance of the touch dial interface. And even Michael was delighted with the packaging it came in. It was like opening up a treasured jewel box.

Since then, I've continued on in my Microsoft based world, but I've had one eye cast longingly at every new item that Apple has come out with.

All of that coveting & longing really came to a head this past year. Tabitha became obsessed that she needed, had to have, "was going to die if she didn't get" an iPod Touch for her birthday. Which, Michael being the pushover he is, got her. Once it was in her hands, she started to show me all the nifty apps & things she could do. And it took about 2 days for me to start wanting my own iTouch. Let's face it - Sam had already eaten the leather case off my Nano & in the process had dented the metal case with his teeth. And since I'm the Mom, not only did I want my own iTouch, but I wanted the 32GB version. Which my family got me for Mother's Day. And which I have tremendously enjoyed ever since.

Then, in later May, my laptop at work started dying a slow death. I did a bit of research and discovered that our EMR software could run on an iPad. It didn't take my partner very long to decide that it was time to up our game. So in early June I came in to find an iPad on my desk. We had some growing pains those first few weeks, but now we can't imagine doing Pediatrics without them. And I'm eagerly keeping my eyes open for the iPad - version 2 that's coming out later this year. I may spring for that upgrade myself.

Then to add to my "Apple envy" some of my co-workers and close friends have iPhones, and I have dearly wanted one for about 9 months. Only problem was that I am tied to Verizon. Very. Tightly. Tied. My family, close & extended, are all on that network, so switching to AT&T would have been very painful. Then lo & behold, Verizon announces they're getting the iPhone4. Be still my pounding heart -- what do I have to do to get one?!?! Turns out, my current phone was overdue for an upgrade and as a current user, I could pre-order.

So Feb 3 at 0200am, I was up. Michael was up. The cats, dogs & daughter all stayed asleep however. We logged on and ordered without a hitch. Feb 7th, a beautiful box from Verizon arrived at our house. Tab, being the spoiled rotten tween that she is, managed to talk Dad into getting her an iPhone too, but hers is the 16MB. I got the 32MB, just because. We thought we were obsessed to get up for 2am, but it turns out that Verizon sold out their pre-order phones within 6 hours. So I count myself as crazy & lucky at the same time!

It actually took me most of the week to get it configured and activated. Last weekend was spent checking out apps and tweaking settings. I also went a little nuts getting new ringtones. Seeing as I've had "Mission Impossible" as my main ringer for 8 years, it was probably time for a change.

So this past week has found me & my new iPhone living a symbiotic relationship. I love that small hunk of gadgetry. It's changed my life. Cliche, yes -- but very true. Texting is easier. Calling is easier. Searching for contacts, calendar dates, etc is easier. I love having all my music, facebook, twitter and Evernotes all at my fingertips. It's so much easier to check my email on the fly. I especially love having my Kindle books with me all the time now, too. And interestingly enough, it gives me some common ground to chat with Tabitha. We keep each other up-to-date on new cool apps, etc.

And did I mention that Michael got me a green case for this one too?

So going back to my intro - Michael is becoming resigned to the fact that the Apple lovers in this house, out number him. He's not ready to join us, but I've caught him playing with my apps! ;-)

And because a blog entry, isn't really an entry until there's a photo with it....

 

 

 
 
 
 

 

Warning -- Bragging Mom Moment....

Indulge me.

I don't brag about my daughter all that often. If anything, I tend to be the pin that bursts her bubble. But this time around I'm pretty proud of her.

Tab & Dad had apparently hatched a plan that she was going to try out something martial art-ish. So while I was at work, one evening the pair of them got her enrolled in a Tae Kwan Do class. And it's no surprise that our natural athlete took to it like a duck to water.

I'll be honest. I wasn't thrilled. This was too close to the 6 months of gymnastics that was her first sport. I had visions of concussions and broken bones as she got to the sparring levels. I believe when the two of them walked in the house after the first class, (looking like cats with fresh canary feathers on their faces - mind you) my comment was "Mark my words -- nothing good will come of this." But being the pessimistic realist that I am, it's just because I'm seeing ER visits and making friends with the local Pedi Ortho.

In two weeks, she had progressed fast enough that she was elibible to test for her yellow belt. It's the Winter season & the evening of the test was one of my late nights last week - so I missed it, but Michael did a good job of running the camera.

This past Wednesday was the award ceremony and Tab got her yellow belt. She was all smiles and wants to keep going. So what the heck. Me? I'll stick with my treadmill, thankyouverymuch....

Here's the video clip Michael caught from her belt test, followed by a few pictures:

   

 
 
 
 
 

Continuing down memory lane....

From yesterday. After looking through all the paper bits and scraps I had kept, I ended up with a few piles. [I'm a "pile-r" genetically. I get it from my Dad.] As I examined each patient sticker and my notes, I forced myself to commit it to one of the piles:

1. "Must Write" - this was the collection that with just a few details, I could clearly remember the patient. See their face. Re-live the situation. On a couple, I even had the heart pounding, lump-in-throat sensation all over again. So obviously, these were the patients that even now -- had really meant something to me. Because of my visceral response, these are the ones who really need their stories told.
2. "Stupid Stuff" - This pile evolved when I started to see a pattern that was best described as "Stupid Stuff That Kids Do". This further got broken down into "Bad Luck", "Bad Judgement", and what I like to refer to as the "Crap Shoot" category.
3. "Interesting" - This was the pile that ended up with the unique patients. Like the one & only kid I saw who really had Menke's Disease. These were mostly the oddities, or interesting milestones, like my first "Champagne Tap". I think they were kind of cool -- but the rest of the world out there, maybe not-so-much. Regardless, I couldn't bring myself to trash these notes. So they became pile #3.
4. & 5. were variation on the theme of "volume". I had kept all my pager & call flow-sheets from my senior resident calls. So these notes were filled with tons of admits for diarrhea, dehydration, RSV, asthma, etc. All the basic routine reasons that kids go into the hospital. Ultimately, this ended up being the biggest stack -- but I couldn't bring myself to trash this either. So it went back into the 2 gallon ziploc bag.
5. more volume, even less interesting
6. "Kuddos" - this was the very, very, very small stack of four pieces of paper that were "Atta-boys" or bits of positive reinforcement from three years of residency. I know I have a few others squirrelled away somewhere. But in general, praise was very far & few between in residency.... ["That which doesn't kill us, makes us stronger...."]

What I found very illuminating after this exercise was this:

• All together, I probably have at least 25 interesting patient stories to write. In someways, that's more than I thought there would be.
• I also am bemused by what I didn't find.

I started my search through reams of paper today, intent on finding one particular patient's information. Which I never did find. And as I looked and sorted and consolidated tonight, I'm remembering a few other stories and patients, and I still haven't found their notes. Which means they either fell victim to an earlier purge -- or I have more stuff squirreled away that I'll find in the future.

Regardless, it's been an interesting process going back through this stuff. I think I've finally recovered enough from the trauma of residency to cope. Time has blunted my responses enough, that mentally - I don't get "stuck" back in that time.

It turns out that I've grown-up enough as an attending, that I am very comfortable knowing what I know, knowing what I don't know, and knowing how to manage the rest. So I don't feel haunted by all the insecurities that went along with residency.

I already know that it's going to take awhile to get all of this written. It doesn't help that as I work on one story, that triggers memories of others. And we all know my strong tendency to chase down rabbit holes....

Have patience and check back soon....

I tend to be a "here & now" kind-of-girl....

But Tuesday found me re-living my not-so-distant past of medical education & residency. [Relatively speaking....I graduated from medical school in 1999.] 

For the past week I had a strong urge to focus on my writing. I realized that I hadn't blogged in about two weeks, even though I had had some ideas. It was just that time wasn't easily available.

I'm one of those people that when I undertake a project, I tend to hyper-focus all of my attention on the project, until I get it done [or mostly done...  <sigh>]. There are pluses & minuses to this approach. The biggest minus is that I tend to not start until I know that I have a dedicated block of time. And if there's been one thing I've really discovered after motherhood, it's that uninterrupted time is a rarity. Which means I have a lot of projects that I haven't even really started....

So especially when it comes to my thought process and "flow" for writing, I prefer to write when I'm by myself and the house is quiet. [Again a rarity!] This means either when Tab is at school, or late at night when everyone else is sleeping/occupied. So schedule-wise lately, with the snow/ice days, Tab's posse of 1/2 a dozen kids at the house, my clinic schedule, pets underfoot, etc - I really haven't had a chance to hear myself think.

So this Tuesday was a gift.

I got Tab to school, got a large Coke Zero from Sonic, and returned to my desk at home.With nothing on the agenda until 3pm, I used my time to revisit my paper stacks from residency.

Some background:

During residency, every procedure that I performed had to be documented ad infinitum. So knowing this as a medical student, I started keeping track of what I saw, what I did, what I learned, the mistakes I witnessed.... I was a habitual paper pack-rat, noting my observations about medical education the entire time I was going through the process.

By the time I got done with four years of medical school, a year of general internship, and then three years of residency; I had accumulated a huge amount of paper. Since that final graduation, I have schlepped every bit of it, all over the state of Texas. Interestingly [and this is one of many reasons I maintain I had PTSD from residency....] I would know the papers were piled up, but I couldn't get rid of them. And I couldn't get myself to sort or purge them either. So they remained stashed in a file box in the garage, a set of binders in a dining room buffet, and overflowing out of a drawer in my office.

The first great purge probably happened about 2005. Although volume-wise I don't think I actually threw away much. But just the fact that I could let go of anything was a victory.  Then about 2007, I decided that I really wanted that office drawer for something else -- probably scrapbook related. So I managed to trash a bit more. In 2009, I actually went through the whole collection and made some serious progress at getting rid of useless paper. And I started to evaluate what I had in terms of "what would make for good writing material?"

That time around I managed to condense what I kept into a 2 gallon ziploc bag.

So on Tuesday [2011 -- sensing an every-other-year pattern here?] I went through my writing material stash and started to get serious about categorizing what I had. What I ended up with, after 5 hours, was essentially three piles and a whole bunch of ideas.

So I'm going to try to seriously work on writing some of these stories, instead of letting them collect dust in sealed ziploc bags...

Stay tuned....

"I *am* the ingenious Google Girl!"....

Or at least that's the running story line amongst my friends & family.

Turns out that I have a knack for research. I always have. Even in the day of libraries and card catalogs. Nowadays research is a whole heck of a lot easier.

Have I mentioned how much I love the internet? I'm not sure you really appreciate how much I depend on the internet....Just sayin'....I live in fear of power failures.

On a daily basis, or at least multiple times a day, I'm on Google looking something up. Tab came in last night and asked me "What does 'haza' mean?" And my answer was "Dunno - let's Google." [Turns out that "haza" is Yiddish for a variety of "Pig", or sometimes is meant for "Hooray" -- Who knew?]

I use Google for everything:

• Need a recipe -- Yup, Google.
• Need ideas for a Valentine's Day banner from scrapbook supplies -- Yup, Google.
• Latest treatment for Pediatric ulcerative colitis -- Yup, Google.
• How to spell "turbidity" -- Yup, Google.
• What's the best app for printing from the iPhone/iPad? -- Yup, Google.
• What's the toxic dose of chlorphenermine for dogs? -- Yup, Google.
• What are the local movie times for The Green Hornet? -- Yup Google.
• What's the phone number for Brio's? -- Yup, Google.
• How to open the gas cap on my brother's Mustang -- For that one I actually used the owner's manuel.

And that's just this past weekend....

What I've learned so far is that search terms or keywords are, well, Key. If what I'm looking for the first time doesn't come up, I try again. And sometimes to get the results I want, means being more general or being more specific. And if I'm looking for geographically relevant results, adding the zip code is a fast way to narrow the results down.

Growing up I heard the words "Go look it up" with religious regularity from my dad. Only in that era (1970s-1980s) "Looking it up" involved a dictionary, an encyclopedia, and a thesaurus. And the worst part about a research paper was the hours spent in the library; thumbing through the card catalog; hunting down the books and reading lots to get the one bit of information needed.

We've come a long way Baby!

My other favorite part about Google is that they do "Doodles" where the header logo changes to recognize various events. In the past week they've honored the birthdays of Jules Verne & Thomas Edison, as well as Valentine's Day. The beauty of the doodles, is that clicking on them leads one to lots of links all related to that topic. And I love tracking down trivia!

So on that note, I'm off to go research some blog ideas....

 

This month so far....

I've been really working hard to "Move More, Eat Less".

Thus far, the scale really hasn't budged a bit. I started at 162.5lbs and it's fluxed up & down about 1.5 pounds, but there hasn't been any consistent change.

What has changed is that I can tell my stamina is improving.

I started the beginning of the month just dying while trying to walk for just 15 minutes. I can now go for 1 hour, and my time record to date was 72 minutes.

Originally I didn't even think about using the incline feature, but now routinely get to the tilt level of 4 to 6.

Originally I was doing good to reach 2mph. Just a few days ago, I did thirty minutes at 3mph.

The first 1.5 weeks, I had horrible shin splints the longer I walked. Now I have to be on the incline for a long time before I feel it.

I started out at about a 35 minute mile. Today I did a 22 minute mile. I'm aiming for a 20 minute mile. At my peak of fitness in college, [when I was fencing, running and in ballet 3 times a week] I could do a 16 minute mile without blinking.

Now, I did skip a few days here and there. When I went up north to visit family, the treadmill did not go with me. And with 3+ feet of snow, there was No Way I was walking outside. I'm just not that big a glutton for that much punishment. But in total, I managed to workout 20 or so days.

I have reached the point, that when I don't walk, I miss it. Even feeling like crud, sick this weekend, I walked both days.

I really enjoy my time listening to music and jamming to my iTunes mixes. And I've noticed that I really do feel better afterwards. Call it that endorphin high or whatever, but more than once this past month, I started walking just so that I could have an exercise buzz.

I'm sleeping much, much better. And some mornings I actually wake up with some energy. [Of course that may be because we seem to have finally gotten my thyroid levels equalized....]

I have notice that my right hip aches at some speeds & intensities. So at some point, I may have to go visit the ortho doc again. But thus far the knees, ankles & feet seem to be hanging in there.

I did splurge 1/2 way through the month and got another set of Under Armour tights & some exercise tops. And a few days ago I got a heart rate monitor watch. I can tell that in the next few months, I'll have to get a replacement set of shoes. And I think I'll be looking for a higher tech version of my heart rate monitor. That way it can work with my treadmill.

Oh, and after 30 days of drinking Coke Zero 99% of the time, I stopped missing "Real Coke" and I actually like the flavor of Coke Zero better. [Gasp! Horrors! ] And I discovered this weekend that the movie theater we usually go to has Coke Zero "on tap"! How cool is that?!?!

Part of me is really looking forward to summer and the start of swim season. And then there's the part of me that would still like about 20 pounds of me to go away....